Listen Up *in Janet Jackson voice*

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I'm getting myself back in the zone. I've been sloppy for weeks now with one foot in and one foot out. Last week I was stellar with exercise, but my eating and drinking needed work. It got real bad towards the end of the week when I ate out of boredom or emotion. I'm going to start getting back to my time structured days. Make sure I'm drinking enough and absolutely no eating of cookies or pies or anything of that nature.

I'll have my balanced three meals, and I'll workout everyday, twice the days that include gym. I'm going to start doing my biggest loser boot camp workout in the mornings/afternoon, before I hit the gym at night. Ive been focusing a lot on things I'm realizing are actually hindering me, like focusing on not being skinny, I'm realizing the impact its having in real-time. It makes me depressed and dwell and discount the positives  (cognitive therapy reference) of everything Ive done so far. I just have to stop focusing on being skinny. Now I'm going to try to focus on the here and now, focusing my attention and obsession with my fitness and nutrition.

This week my weight got down to 442.4, today its 444.6. I reckon my weight will fluctuate as I add even more fitness to my routine and build muscle, as iffy as my eating has been I don't believe any gain has been due to actual fat (it still sucks to see the number go up). I'm going to try to focus less on the numbers and just try to watch my body to see changes. This is the plan for the week as for as diet and exercise. I'm also going to make it a point to watch more things like movies, and find a good game to play.

I also decided I'm going to dust off my actual Kindle and put books on it, I think maybe my iPad has always had too much going on and reading my books on it was just too distracting. I think this will be much less of an issue on my actual Kindle because it only has one purpose.

I do have to wear a belt with all my shorts now. The shirt is a 3x and is tight and it shows, and Im not a fan of myself is such honest bright clothing. I also have a button up 3x shirt that I cant button up yet, so Im still in the 4x area, still it'll be interesting to return to these overtime and see changes


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