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Showing posts from June 28, 2015

[no longer] Just The Damage

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Independence Day was quite nice, it was humid, fireworks could be heard entirely too often, entirely too close, and from entirely too many directions,  but no I didn't watch them, still  it was nice day like I said. Mom went all out on the menu Ribs, Hamburgers, Brats,  Hot dogs, Chicken, Baked Beans and Baked potato salad. What you see below is I did not at all go for variety, I'm a brat, and dog guy, but that baked potato salad was the unexpected star of the day. I planned games with my nephews Call Of Duty and Super Smash Brothers for awhile, my uncle stopped by for awhile I didn't talks see him though. My Mom sent my grandmother a plate of food since she decided to do all the cooking this year. I actually invited a few friends over to grab a bite but they had plans already. I never did get around to starting a book sadly, soon for sure! I enjoyed my day :) I can eat a maximum of 3,450 calories a day, here is what I ate today. Round 1 2 barbecued bratwurs

Books & Brats

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There is not much to say about today. It's Friday. I am   going to start reading again. Books in my Kindle app on my iPad take up 1.3GBs (gigabytes) of space I'm not sure why this bugs me, but it does. Nothing else comes close. When I got my iPad I originally got it as an extension to photography, I even got the camera connection kit and Photoshop Touch, which was recently removed from the App Store  (but not that crappy Express thing) , but my depression, anxiety, and " am I good enough " " do I look right doing this " made me shy away from photography and I gradually started using my iPad for other things, reading, drawing, etc.  I don't know if it's cool or crazy to have so much memory being used on books, the irony I suppose is I want them gone so I can make more room for even more books, or... Perhaps to use for photos if I were to engage in photography again soon... Perhaps Max calorie limit 3,450, here's today's damage. Bre

July, Bad Apples & Bad Knees

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It suddenly dawned on me that a new month just slipped into transition and I hadn't even noticed, or made a big deal of it. Without further ado. Seven months in now, this is scary, perhaps I'm not taking my weight loss journey as serious as I was before. Maybe I have gotten too comfortable with this super slow pace, actually I just realized I haven't been walking in weeks, I need to build up the enthusiasm to do them again, at least the indoor videos, I need a kick start. Maybe next week I'll do another  Boot Camp Week  like I did in April. It's been a quiet day, I got into a bit of an argument with my friend Matt again (that same one that I said I shouldn't be friends with) and it really got under my skin. I feel so stuck at times I don't deserve to have bad people in my life especially when I treat them well, but I don't have options. Do I shut the door on the bad bad apples and risk my already humble circle of friends shrinking into oblivion?

Mellow Fellow

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Therapy went well, it was nice to be back after that week hiatus, however I was informed another would be following next week, blërg! It's been a slow day for me, I've kind of been sticking to myself in my room. My nephew hasn't requested me at all today, and I haven't at all felt compelled to be as social as I have been in previous days. I have just been in my room listening to music and at times watching one of my favorite shows, Impartical Jokers. It's funny as I was writing this my nephew came and hung out with me for about an hour in my room, we mostly joked around and watched Impractical Jokers, it was fun. Then we went to play some Super Smash Brothers on the Wii U for awhile. I can eat a maximum of 3,450 calories, here is what I ate today. Breakfast 2 servings of Low-fat cinnamon graham crackers, with a cup of vanilla soy milk 360 calories total Lunch 4 tablespoons of Salsa, And 3 oz of yellow tortilla chips 450 calories tot

Nephews, & A Slight Chemical Imbalance

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My nephew arrived late last night, so late I had already fallen asleep. I think some time this week I might go visit my dad, I'm not sure why, but I might, the very thought gives me feelings of resentment towards myself which. Find most unsettling. I suddenly realized I have therapy tomorrow,  feels like it's been every other week the past four weeks.  There was homework to do, some I could still do, and I might. Today my nephew wanted to go to Gamestop to get a new game, for some reason I had some Power Up rewards card with them, I can't remember when the last time I've been there. I only own a Wii U and Nintendo 3DS (I'm all about Nintendo, don't get me started!) and I only bought digitally (last year specifically) so it was an odd discovery. While looking online he noticed he could get a game he wanted cheaper with my rewards card. I told him he could use it and mom agreed to take him, unfortunately he wanted me to tag along, I made it clear I wasn't nec

Weigh-in And More

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Lets get to it. Last time I  weighed 475, this week I weigh in at 472, 3 pounds down. Not too shabby. The good news is I have lost, I'm back on the right path, the less good news is I'm still up from where I was several weeks ago and that stings. So here is a new thing I'm going to do weekly. Just to sort of reflect a bit on the past week in a sort of minor way. Just a graph it shows the start of the (previous) week to the end of the week, from left to right. The first blue dot is the starting point and the black line is my state of mind. Last week was rather mild. No serious yoyoing, or mountain hikes or spikes going on. It ended ideally. I think the goal, or the ideal graph is for them all to look similar to this one. They will serve a purpose  at some point perhaps. My eldest nephew never made it down yesterday, and has yet to make it as of this writing. Its starting to look murky as to whether he will make it down.  My friends invited me to hang out this we

Blërg

Yesterday afternoon I was randomly asked to watched my youngest nephew Kieyrn overnight, it was his mothers birthday and she was going out to celebrate with some gal pals. Her father already agreed to watch his older brother, and Kieyrn apparently does not like him so she asked me to watch him. I thought it over for a while. I don't like things to suddenly be dropped on me, it gives me a great deal of anxiety, even when it involves my nephews, I prefer at least a days notice. But after thinking it over for an hour I agreed. It made for a fun night, he was adorable as ever. Calories for the day were a new week peak of 2,700+. At some point today my youngest nephew will depart and my eldest will arrive. I'm actually still quite tired from last night, the good thing about teens is generally they don't demand 100% of your attention at all times. Admittedly I've found him just as exhausting at times  (LOL) . It will be an interesting week. I'm glad he gets to come down

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