Full Time Friend

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I need more. or at least, one. I have great friends, but when I'm having an internal meltdown, when I'm having a total crisis about everything and nothing, when I'm on the verge of ending it all, when I'm feeling insecure and need reassurance, when everything is going wrong, when I have a lot on my mind and just need to talk. There is no one, if I message you in crisis and you you respond 3 hours later, you aren't someone I can go to. But people say this all the time “if you ever need to talk” that’s what they say. That’s not what they mean.

I don’t need someone I can access 24/7, that’s not realistic, but it would be nice if I could actually rely on someone. I have to get through everything on my own. Then I have therapy once a week, one day to get an entire week off my chest, while trying to learn new cognitive strategies to help me better deal with these on my own. Its a lot.


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