Instagram 📷

Last year about a month after I made this blog, I made an Instagram account by the same name. I wasn't sure if I was going to use the account often and I was nervous of the extra type of accountability especially considering at the time I did not know my exact numbers. I only uploaded 3 pictures during that the entire year. Having developed body dysmorphic disorder, that would keep me away from sharing pictures on such a platform.

A year later I decided to take a look at the weight loss community on Instagram, yes, that's a thing. It was last year as well, but to a seemingly much less degree. It seems to have really exploded in the last year. I decided to upload to older pictures of me, currently there isn't a single picture of me on the account from this year. That just feels safer, what I did notice while going through my cloud service to get some pictures of me was that I did actually notice a difference between two pictures from last year from as little time as February to April. Nothing major just I did "see" so that was something.

All that being said it's quite intimidating to see all the transformation people on there now, they seem nice, some have even followed me but I'm always so cut to pieces when I see some of their starting weights like 240, 380,390 etc. I am following someone who has lost over 200lbs and their start weight was over 600 which is a lot more relatable, obviously that's above my highest on record weight but I still estimate that at some point I reached over that 600 mark.

I'll update the account sporadically mostly with older pics of peak weight's cause I'm just more comfortable showing those. It's a little ironic, though, there was a time where I would never have wanted anyone to see peak shots at all, and now I hide the current, slightly-less peak me... I'm all kinds of messed up lol. There's a link on the right side of the blog to the Instagram if you're interested in taking a peak (though as of now I'm pretty sure all of those pictures have been posted on this blog at some point).

Comments

  1. I haven't seen your Instagram but think you should keep it updated with current photos. If you only look at the older pics, it will keep you thinking you are still at that weight. You have to help yourself mentally move to your current size.

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  2. Hmm, this is tricky, but I suppose I'll upload more up to date pics at times too, though... I think for now the plan is to mostly upload older ones for now. When I see that first image on the account it makes me so nervous about how I currently look cause I just don't see much of a loss and I don't want to make a fool of myself

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