Seeking Refuge In Food

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I'm In the bad place

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Mug Shots

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Tuesday already,  I didn't end up reading or scheduling any appointments yesterday but plan on making up for it today. I did however look into exercise videos and honestly I pretty much decided I'll just be sticking to what I'm doing even though it's starting to bore me. I'm just going to keep on doing the Leslie Sansone Videos. Yesterday's two miles seemed to go smoother than usual, I feel like I might finally be entering the mastering phase. I haven't attempted the 3 mile walk since a few weeks ago but I'm going to give it another go one day this week. Also Soon I'll be walking at the park, I'll fill you all in on that soon enough. I entertained the thought of making videos again, not sure if any you remember when I was posting videos early last year. They stopped completely after my stint in the Behavioral Health Pavilion.  That was of course before I had numbers of my weight, I had no idea what I was losing. Though I can obviously be qu...
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It's Always Darkest Before The Dawn

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Once again it somehow seems I found my way to the brink of yet another week. I didn't do too much this weekend, I got to see my nephew Kieryn, that was a treat. Literally the first thing he did when he walked in the door was asked where I was at, that felt pretty good. This past week eating wise was any improvement but not ideal, I think I took in too much sodium, I didn't get to the gym the 3 times I wanted either so this weigh-in might actually be another upset which I really just don't need . I do plan on changing things up a bit this week, indefinitely. My calorie goal has dropped down by almost 300, going to start eating boiled eggs and toasts for breakfast maybe with jam and oatmeal still figuring that out. I'm going get on a fixed medicine schedule, I take my morning meds at such varying times each day, now I'm just going to make sure that I have an exact time from now on. Exercising will be a daily thing now, no more every other or skipping days. Resume po...
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It's been a pretty rough week, I had a lot of emotional battles that I sometimes lost. I feel a way I can't describe. This whole week I've had fast food, Taco Bell twice, KFC, Canes, and Chipotle. I told myself the journey was over, but somehow I remained incredibly conscious and cautious of the places I chose to eat at. I wanted to be destructed, but ended  up being quite tame. The most I took in on a single day was 2,500 calories, and that was Monday, a day I had no fast food, every day since has been lower. I've been bothered by it. I wanted to revert back to the old me, and eat recklessly everyday, but that didn't happen. There is a part of me that wouldn't give up completely, it whispered in my ear like Jiminy Cricket, steering me clear if making the worst decisions possible. I could have had pizza everyday this week, Pizza Hut has a new dipper pizza, and Little Cesar's has a deep dish bacon wrapped  (literally whole bacon wrapped around the crust)...
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