Yikerz

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Failed already
Mom unexpectedly bought me McDonald's for breakfast. Did have the will to turn it away.

Maybe tomorrow...

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The Weigh-in

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Lets get straight to it. Last week I was 448.2 pounds, this week I am 444.8. Down 3.4 pounds. I discovered yesterday that the psychiatrists office called Friday at some point and left a message. For whatever reason the phone didn't ring, anyways, it wasn't until yesterday that I discover that my FREAKING MONDAY APPOINTMENT WITH THE PSYCHIATRIST HAD BEEN DELAYED YET ANOTHER WEEK!!!!! I'm at my whits end on this situation, I think this is number 5 or 6. I like my psychiatrist even though I've only seen her a total of maybe 3 times since having to switch from the previous because of the infamous...   incident . I didn't have these issues with my last one however! I don't want to have to consider looking for a new psychiatrist, I really don't. The very idea gives me anxiety, but if they somehow have some need to push back yet another week, I think I'll have no choice. I did make it to my primary doctor today,  blood pressure was perfectly normal. I men...
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3 Miles And All Smiles

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Image
The week has begun and that means an increase to my exercise routine. Previously I mentioned I was doing Leslie Sansone 's in-door walking routines, I started initially with a single mile, then two, and now I'm doing 3. Honestly, this one was a lot more intense than I anticipated, had me sweating and huffing in no time. Its a 46 minute set and halfway through I was begging for it to be over, but I didn't quit and charged ahead and until I completed it. I cant recall a time in recent memory Ive been so proud of myself! That being said, its clear to me that 3 miles a day for the week is going to be tough, and its going to take a lot more endurance and determination than previous weeks. But I'm committed to this new healthy active lifestyle and wont slow down now. Here is the video I'm doing for the week
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Help I'm Alive, My Heart Keeps Beating Like A Hammer

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Yesterday I was on the borderline of having nervous breakdown in the morning.I think partially that is due to the fact that two days  I started a new dosage of one of my depression medications. But I took it wrong, I was going to switch from  80mg to 120mg but accidentally took 200, so I took both. The the day after I took literally 0 medications, so yesterday I was feeling erratic. I literally wanted to die at times, I was emotional, crying, felt like my skin was crawling like I had to move. Then finally it moved on after I did take my medication and started listening to a podcast and slept All day. I just kept sleeping and sleeping. I woke up to eat some pizza and went back to bed . Today I'm feeling unsure, I'm kind of feeling  like one of those former sports players who's lost all their glory.  I don't like to say that  I've lost weight outloud. I'm on my own
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