A personal, weight loss & mental health Odyssesy. Raw, unfiltered and honest
Superbowl Sunday
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Its the day of the biggest sporting event of the year, the Superbowl, and I'm going to a buddies Superbowl party. Ive actually been having second thoughts about going, honestly if I hadn't already committed to going I wouldn't, but I think it would be rather rude not to show up at this point. It isn't the food, but I tend to just get a lot of anxiety when I know I'm going to be in a group of people, even if its people Ive known half my life. The fear of being judged is still present, and the fear of being introduced to new people is also scary because, again, Id worry I'm being judged, it could all be in my head, but the thoughts always there.
All the above being said, I'm going to try to have a good time, and enjoy myself and the commercials, and the company. It should be fun.I will be taking pictures, and maybe some videos so look forward to an update later on in the day, and if not Ill fill you guys in tomorrow on the festivities.
Please take a look at my latest video for YouTube.
Laying in my bed then suddenly I recognize a familiar tune. Its none other than the ice cream truck. I think "at this time of the year?" "In this weather?" and then I remember its almost june, then I look out my window and see that its very nice weather. I've been in my room so much, boxed in my four walls of solitude and comfort, that I lose grasp that there is an outside world. Living is happening out there, something I may never truly experience. About a month ago I got a random call from a friend, we chatted for awhile about all kinds of silly things. It was nice. He eventually started telling me about another friend of his, V, they've been friends since before we met. He tells me V has basically given up on life, plays MMO games all day, rarely leaves the house, has incredibly poor hygiene, accepts he'll be alone forever, no career prospects, no significant other, nothing. And he doesn't care anymore. He is in his mid 40s. I couldn't help bu...
I am an addict. Why would you do something that deliberately destroys you or your body , is what the thought that goes into my head when I hear about people addicted to hard drugs. Okay the thought isn't quite that generic but that's the point. You know what that drug is capable of, what it will almost undoubtedly do to your body, why start it? People start drugs for many reasons, I started my food (drug) as a child to cope. You're warned about drugs as a child, told not to smoke, stay away from alcohol, even condition to try not to get fat. But no one tells you that you can get addicted to food, and young child you cant articulate that you are addicted to food and have an emotional reliance on it too for the exact same reasons (what ever they may be) as some who is shooting up heroin or cocaine. Breaking the habit at any age is hard. Its strange being an adult, seeing the wrong and repeating it anyways. Its like you are on a little raft drifting down a river abou...