Thanos Snap

-



And with the snap of my fingers, all the food was gone. Today was the worse day yet. After starting off strong by walking this morning, I promptly effed it up by eating an entire pack of Oreos, and row of oatmeal cookies with milk. Later, I had leftovers, that sesame chicken dish from a few days ago, topped off with two strawberry cheesecake ice cream sandwiches. I just felt like I could keep going and going. 

Tomorrow I’m taking control, this has gotten out of hand, I’m building my ship to wreck all over again. I must advert the path I’m on, or I will balloon back up to 600lbs for a 3rd, possibly final time. I don’t want to be like this anymore.

Another Thanos snap to make it right


Popular posts from this blog

Loose Skin

-
Image
So there it is for all to see the loose, hanging skin on my arms that was once filled with nothing but fat. I didn't really pay too much attention to this growing phenomenon  until last year when a certain incident occurred that I deliberately decided not to write about because  I would not only discard the good things that happened that day, but turn this into an actual bigger issue. The incident occurred one of the first times I went to the gym solo and was coming back, it was one of the better days if I recall. I had my arm out the window (or on the window seal) enjoying the breeze and we were stopped at a red light. I noticed in my rear-view mirror that in one of the cars in the next lane was a guy talking to some woman, and he looked over at my arm and said "that guys got a really big arm." Then the light went green, it didn't really click to me at first, but when I was bigger I used to try to avoid hanging my arm on or out the window because I was emba
Read more

Extraction

-
Hey everyone you would not believe the bloody nightmare I was in over the weekend, ah yes that tooth. I can't put it into words, but I was in pure agony. I couldn't sleep, literally I could not even lay down because it increased blood flow to the area. I  was in such pain my mother was stress eating chips like Hoover vacuums suck in dirt, poor thing. Is that weird, I felt bad for her feeling bad for me? Knowing there was nothing she could do. All the usual home remedies failed horribly, I could only take Tylenol which I might as well have taken nothing! Anyways  said tooth could not be redeemed and the dentist extracted today upon examination. I can't workout today because I have to take it easy, I have a doctors appointment tomorrow, the week looks like buissness as usual, I'm thinking of maybe going for a walking-photo-taking-adventure ( this week, I know I'm going to have one but will it be this week? I have a few posts thought out for this week that I th
Read more

Mental Illness & Obesity, Seems One Is Getting The Best Of Me

-
A handful of weeks ago it looked like I was on the fast track to recovery still. I was going to therapy, making medical appointments, taking my necessary medications, still losing weight. It wasn't perfect, but I seemed to be in an all around better place, I'm sure many of you would agree. In the last couple weeks in particular, however, I seem to have done a 180. My already lacking, optimism, shot to smithereens. My weight loss has slowed down. Will to carry on, weak. And I honestly can't make sense of it. On paper everything sounds perfect, I'm losing weight, receiving counseling, getting more active, there's those non-scale victories. So why is it I'm in what seems like an eternal cloud of depression? I feel like I had so much more control before, and now nothing. My medication is suppose to be in full effect by now, how is it I was more stable at the beginning, than I am now? A couple days ago I had a severe breakdown, I even told my mom I wasn't sure
Read more

Archive

Show more