The Weeks Drawing Projects

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ASMR

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If youve watched any of my recent videos you may have noticed I talk quite quietly, that's because I'm shooting ASMR.   Autonomous sensory meridian response  sometimes auto sensory meridian response, is a tingling sensation that typically begins on the scalp and moves down the back of the neck and upper spine. A pleasant form of paresthesia , it has been compared with auditory-tactile synesthesia and may overlap with frisson. Wiki Basically a lot of arbitrary sounds at  very low frequencies, amplified. ASMR is one of the endeavors I want to delve into this year. I have hopes to build an audience and focus a lot of my time towards it.
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Borderline Personality Disorder

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Sigh. Sometimes knowing which emotions are real and which aren’t feels impossible. The extreme-ness of this condition is overwhelming. I’m constantly over-reacting internally. My mood playing jump-rope and changing with every loop. Am I a bad person? Does having BPD make me inherently bad?  Yesterday I had one of my signature emotion-based overreactions. A frivolous accident occurred, a slipping of one’s mind really, but I implied the person involved did it on purpose. Granted I was warranted being upset, but part of me knew it was just a simple mistake, but I couldn’t regulate the intense hurt and venom I felt and after calling them out I threw in “you probably did it on purpose!” Why, why did I do that? Now said, unsaid person isn’t talking to me. Even if part of me genuinely did feel like it was deliberate, I used a “you” statement, I know better than that. You statements just make people defensive.  Now I’m stuck between all these extreme emotions, the original hurt and ve...
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Slow Down, Slow Down

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There goes gravity, bringing me down, there goes gravity slowing me down. Reach for the stars but nothing is there, they’re all gone, space is bare. The infinite pool of nothingness seems so meaningless, seamlessly drifting aimlessly, into dark abyss 
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