The Family Buisness
To say I am in awe at the person my brother has become is a bit of an understatement, but I had to think to myself of the now real possibility that I've become the lone letdown of a son. My brother has gotten a job in welding and is a hit at the workplace. Ever since he has come home he has talked about welding with a level of passing that is admirable, but I honestly wondered if it would actually last until he got to working. It has. The passion, and enthusiasm is still there if not more, he really loves what he does. He is even going to go back to school later in the year or early next year, to help further his career in welding. My other brother is now looking into the field while currently in Texas. He is currently a welder's assistant. He is going to take the necessary steps to be a qualified welder himself within the year, but is also looking into going to school for other things (that's the brother that's insanely talented with art), he is actually working two jobs right now.
Anyways, the other day my brother was going on and on about his job, he mentioned maybe one day starting up a family business in welding, him our other brother, and I would handle like the Business end of things, and data and communications. I smiled and nodded, but just felt gutted. He has all this ambition and future plans. Truth is I'm still not sure there is a future for me (no lectures!). Life comes at you fast they say, my brother left that day saying I should look up stuff about welding, I said I would, but knew I wouldn't, I felt like crap and spent the most part of that day and night in quite a funk.
My brothers go to prison for several years come out talking the talk, promptly walk the walk. Meanwhile in the same timeframe I've been out in the free world just being huge, and I'm still freaking huge, I'm not a changed person! My mom isn't proud of me, I don't have ambitions. I don't know what I'm saying, I've never compared to them and never will. I never considered the horrifying reality of things if they actually turned things around, how even more inferior that might make me. All that said I actually am quite happy that they have turned things around for a change. Finally my nephews can have their fathers in their life, and perhaps learn some things. It's certainly time they be fathers, they owe it to their kids and the mothers.