Brandon, Who Lives At Home

Its Wednesday already, eating has been good, and Ive been going to the gym nightly. I recently decided to start weighing in daily, at first I thought this was crazy but it really helps me keep an eye on where things are. A few days ago I was 346, I'm currently 343.8. I suspect these numbers might be new muscle developed and my body is trying calibrate accordingly. I just recently noticed just how much loose skin Ive got going on, on my upper legs/thighs, I noticed it before but I didn't realize there was so much in the area. The area does look slimmer to me though. Ive been having my usual ups and downs about image, I recently have been considering whether to stop using instagram as Im not sure if its good for me. Ive been getting really wrapped up in other peoples progress and feeling like Im just not doing well, I really need to get out of this frame of thought. Im just waiting for my flat stomah to come along. Sometimes I get really discouraged. I think I want to get bac...

Its been a good week in terms of consumption and fitness. I've been eating really well, I'm back on point with water and exercising nightly everyday this past week at the gym. Physically I'm feel well, mentally I'm doing okay. I had some moments where I got down, entered a low mood state, but I was able to breakthrough. I visited my doctor last week who decided I  don't need one of the 2 blood pressure medications I've been on, so that has been stopped. Now I am down to just the one. I was taking 4 at one point. Today I'm taking it easy, might watch a movie, do some laundry. This chaotic weather  should be getting less cold in the next couple weeks so it's time I dust off the shorts. Its a fro kind of night. #weightloss #weightlossjourney #healthandfitness #weightlossmotivation #weightlosssupport #weightlossprogress #weightlosscommunity #lossingweight #gettinghealthy #gymselfie A post shared by Brandon Hall (@brandonwholivesathome) on Mar...

Buongiorno ~ Hope everyone is having a good day. I'm feeling good, not fighting off depression today with a metamorphical bat. It's interesting how much can change in a day. It's interesting how much can change in a few hours, it's interesting how much sleep can change things. Carry on. 😌 #smile #me #weightlossjourney #selfie #losingweight A post shared by Brandon Hall (@brandonwholivesathome) on Mar 14, 2017 at 11:09am PDT

Times have been interesting. I'm back in the gym, I'm working out more than ever, my eating has stabilized. I'm now going to the gym at night with a buddy who I had not talked to or seen in some time, he's actually gotten me to try out some of the other machines that I was too chicken to try before, so now I'll have even more muscle being worked out. He is also getting into photography and is wanting my help to figure out his new Nikon DSLR, so I'll be helping him out with that and he has a few photo trips in mind for the future I've been invited on. This is all pretty sudden, and promising. My eating has been fine, I still need to smooth out some edges, I had a jumbo honey bun today which was delicious but nutritionally awful. I need to really make sure I'm drinking my water right, now with the increased activity I really haven't been in the zone about this the way I need to be. My mom recently told me she was going to have weight loss surgery...

Yesterday and today I started doing the Biggest Loser Boot Camp Workout, for the first week you do this strength training cardio combo that's 25 minutes. Honestly it's been obliterating me, I use my 10lb dumbbells for most of the workout, there are squats and lunges and all kinds of things and that first day I wasn't sure I would get through it to be quite honest, but I did. Today I decided one day was enough of hearing Bob Harpers voice instruct and command, I needed music to give me that power I needed, and I preformed much better today than yesterday but still was a sizzling  hot mess, I don't see myself adding on the next part of the workout after the first week, I'll just stay at my own pace, and move on when I've mastered this first part. This workout is really going to develop muscle so, the gears in my head already want me to stop this and go back to doing my full body cardio via Leslie Sansone because muscle weighs more than fat and I could get...

I got everything set back up with Planet Fitness, so I can start going again which is pretty cool, it will be interesting to see how this effects the journey moving forward. Currently I am not sure when I will go or what my routine will be. I got a Simply Fit Board last week, its a workout balance board you simply twist on ( supports up to 400lbs) . I gave it a quick try last night, it will take some getting used to before I can really take advantage of it, but it will be really nice to use this as part of my home routines now.  I wont have a full opinion on this until later in the month after Ive used it for a while. The Simply Fit Board (mine is blue) Now that I'm home eating is back to normal, I'm ready to kick things in gear.

I spent a few days with friends over the weekend. I had plans to do things different, they knew of my weight gain and how it affected me and even apologized for their contribution and claimed that they were starting to eat healthier themselves. The reality of things was the contrary however, someone decided to order two large pizzas Sunday,  I had several slices. Today I decided to leave. I had to get out of that environment. It really forced me to look at things deeper, its early in the month and Ive already given in to poor eating habits.  I think I'm just going to have to go on hiatus from visiting those friends indefinitely, maybe Ill figure out another solution out down the line but for now this is what I have to do. Peoples actions often contradict the things they say which is why I faced such hard battles with distorted thinking last year. I'm not in any type of bad place about this at the moment, but this is just some clarity that in terms of going backwards, there...

Well I'm up from my down, mentally anyways, I'm ready to take the month by storm and get back to doing what I do best, losing weight. This month I'm plotting a return to the gym, getting things situated with my bank and checking account and getting back to it (wasn't until writing this that I thought it was  odd that I wasn't even slightly bit nervous at the prospects of going back after such a long hiatus, then I asked myself if I should be, and now I slightly am) . I'm no longer going to buy food I know will be harmful for my goals, like those cookies. I plan to be active even when I go over to my friends, Ill take a dog for a walk or something I'm also going to start taking my food scale and stop eating fast food when I'm over there also, or if I do make it something sensible, if guilt comes into the equations I shouldn't have it. No slacking on my water, I did that plenty of times last month.Watch more movies because that's been fun. Get ba...

Ive gained weight, an even 2lbs. I weighed in a 344.8 up from 342.8.  I'll never adjust to a gain,  I immediately went right back to bed and began the process of psychological torment that I typically  do in these cases, beating myself down, thinking about how I'm now down an entire month of progress, then to the regret  and soon I started to wonder if I had been noticing those 2lbs somewhere, maybe in my face, maybe in my gut, or arms, maybe something wasn't fitting right. Literally every time I gain any amount of weight I get convinced (a lot of the time before the result) that I can see or feel the gain somewhere. The bad thing about my weigh-ins before was that they could set the mood for an entire week, well this year now that Ive switched to monthly they can set the mood for an entire month, I have to wait an entire month to rectify the situation and this dark cloud will be hovering over me the entire time. I feel like every time I gain weight I have to ...

can barely tell but, Ive got mini man bun going on here Well I'm slightly more prepared for tomorrows weigh-in than I was yesterday, I certainly took a lot of short cuts this month eating-wise and took way too many breaks from exercising. This next month I'm really going back to basics, back to cutting things out I know I shouldn't have around. This is really whats hindering me. I don't know what to expect, I don't know if Ill be out of the 340s, or if Ill possibly gain, I just don't know. Tomorrow we see.

I always like when people refer to movies as "picture films." I actually watched some movies over the weekend several days in a row. I even watched one this morning called The Loft , yesterday I watched The Account with Ben Affleck (so good). Its been really nice getting caught up in movie worlds for a little bit of time again, especially the horror ones, I really love a good spooky film. I watched one called From The Dark that was really good and I actually have a few to watch tonight so that should be scary fun. I got some Canadian bacon because I was told this was better for me than regular bacon because its considered lean or whatever, I also got some peanut butter 2 that I'm planning on making on an Instagram story video thing maybe today, its basically this powdery peanut butter you add water to that turns into normal peanut butter that has less fat and calories than regular peanut butter, so if you're following me on Instagram be looking out for that. How ...

Therapy Wednesday went pretty well, I realize its now Friday and I'm just now mentioning therapy. I mostly just vented about things, which I really needed to do to be honest. I haven't been doing my homework assignments for therapy and I keep thinking about how I keep coming back to this image thing, and how I just binge ate the other day subconscious self-sabotaging myself. Ive been thinking about how hard it is to change this part of my thinking, this area of my mind. This is destroying my chance of happiness in the here and now, and I'm going to wind up having major depressive events at this rate like last year. I was thinking, about when I was younger, in fact, no, when I was at my peak weight, so not that long ago. Back when I used to think I could never seriously lose weight, never thought I could have a lifestyle change, could never radically overhaul my life and cut back in food. When I thought I would be 600+ Lbs forever, that there was no way I was ever going to...